If a group of scientists came out and said that millions of Americans were suffering PTSD from surviving 2020 (so far), that wouldn't surprise me a bit. Each day I see more posts about trying to be positive or do something, or posts about having difficulty dealing with what was going on lately. For myself, … Continue reading The months of This American Madness have robbed me of my mind…
I admit, I don't really go for the Woo anymore. I used to get rocks and cool crystals and stuff when I was a kid, and like many an X-Files fan (the Mulder years, anyway), I considered or subscribed to conspiracy theories or the supernatural or paranormal and what was possible or impossible. However, I … Continue reading When emotions have become too damned much in a short time: an empath searches for sanity.
Thank you, Narrator from Fight Club, for making my point nicely. Yesterday was one of those days where nothing was going right and I ended up on my garage floor, hugging my dog and bawling my eyes out. I've been in a state of needing to be around people until it hurt too much to … Continue reading The Waiting Game Continues… just didn’t expect the weeping, wailing & dead-eyed staring at walls, too.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm fooling myself. Scratch that. It's in the back of my mind every day. I'm always wondering if I'm fooling myself, that I believe I'll find some talent deep within, nurture it, and make my life more complete, better. Into something resembling what I want. But each day I wake up … Continue reading Making genuine life changes vs. wasting lots of time.
I love Super Mario Bros. Anyhoo... I suppose being sick for over a solid week has just screwed me up. First it was allergies, then it was a full-blown cold. The weather can't make up it's mind. it's supposed to be in the 80 degree range this week then jump straight into summer, at least, … Continue reading Digging that side tunnel: a cousin to rock-bottom
I'm glad I waited until today to actually write this, because yesterday was a mix of very volatile emotions, as was the night before. I needed a bit of frantic energy, time, and self-destruction in the form of cheese and greasy meat before I felt ready. My dad's been in the hospital since the other … Continue reading How NOT to tell someone about your worsening health.
...when I'm on the verge of trying to change things for the better. Somehow during the night some cement shoes will end up on my feet: as my mind screams for me to get up and do something, I just lay there and hear it, but I can't move an inch.