I’ve been trying to find new ways to eat healthier the past few days, and spent time making salads for myself (and the birds, so to speak) while getting my schedule back on track. Yesterday was a pretty good trial run, and today seems to have done pretty well. But I was worried because I thought “oh heavens, I’ve slipped.”

But perhaps it’s a chance to have an experiment instead, because working around temptations is just gonna have to happen sometime.

I finished up the last of the instant oatmeal for breakfast because I got a late start (as opposed to making my own oatmeal from a recipe book… that’s for tomorrow) and started my routine for the day. The weather outside’s making it iffy–got a bad storm. And then for lunch I wasn’t quite hungry yet, so during my writing break I went to the shed to work on my elliptical.

I gotta admit, I’m having fun with my exercise equipment again, even if some of the songs I don’t care for. I should’ve done it a lot earlier, but I forgot to set my alarm, hence the late start to the morning. I got some water and worked out, and then realized I absolutely had to get a couple of things from the local store. So I stocked up and by habit, wandered over to the frozen foods section.

My experiment, so to speak, is to have a minimal amount of frozen stuff in the house so I don’t overindulge and I learn to stretch things out. I got a few of those little frozen deep dish pizzas and a ham and cheese Hot Pockets. I usually get a helluva lot more and because of my laziness, the whole basket would be gone in quick succession. I thankfully steered clear of the breakfast section because my stomach can’t handle the greasiness and salt from those breakfast bowls and the sandwiches are too expensive.

So I got in and heat up a package of pizzas, got some more water, and had enough energy in me that I decided to get back out and do another workout trail on the elliptical. There was a glitch the past weekend that needed fixing and I’d let the update go through, so I figured I’d make sure it was fixed and get some more exercise (hee hee). They’ve all been short tracks because I’m just getting back into the swing of things, a mile or a little less at most. I gotta say it was fun, and my lunch was cooking while I worked out the 2nd time.

I initially worried when I got home that pizza wasn’t a good idea to experiment with because there are some foods that just trigger a vacuum response in me, in that I’ll just snap and inhale all I can find til I get sick (and that doesn’t do a lick of good for a recovering bulimic). I learned that I can’t do toaster waffles or make pancakes anymore because my taste buds want all that butter and syrup and I’ll make myself sick. I threw half a bottle of syrup away to prevent me from buying more waffles to put it on. Maybe someday I can have ’em again, but not right now.

Same goes with dishes with lots of potatoes in them, donuts, cookies, & mac and cheese. Probably a few other things, but those stick in my mind the most. All comfort foods I grew up with, dammit.

I had the pizza about two hours ago, eating slower than usual, and I haven’t had the urge to run in there and make more because my taste buds demand it. I think cheese is my biggest weakness. I’m lactose intolerant, but can handle some dairy. A glass of milk? No. But some cheese in the meal? No biggie…as long as it’s not too much. If it’s practically oozing cheese or some mozzarella sticks, I’d be hunched over in pain in no time flat. And as I’ve practically been addicted to cheese my whole life, it’s going to take some work for me to cut it out completely.

I don’t know how people quit “cold turkey”. I’ll just have to aim for moderation and hope I can make it work like how I feel about table sugar: I just won’t want it much, if at all, in the coming years.

I don’t like the idea of relying on exercise to help me curb my cravings, because that leads to exercise bulimia if you’re not careful, overindulging in that to offset the calories that you’re ingesting. Well, I haven’t been eating to excess in a long time. Somehow I was always so busy (or tried to keep myself that way) that I made it a habit to just inhale what I could and not let my body tell me that I’d had enough.

My stomach’s no doubt stretched out from the years of eating badly and too much at once, so I can no doubt handle more in one sitting than some, but I’m not eating til full and in pain. I’m determined to make that work, because that’s likely been the absolute worst part of not being able to lose weight. Forget “what,” but “how much” at a time. Cutting my food intake in half will be fantastic and that will help the pounds drop right there. I’ve also been putting when to have breakfast, lunch, dinner in my schedule and trying to keep within an hour of two in that time.

I have stayed in that bad habit I created where I eat as much as I can in one swoop because I wasn’t sure the next time I would get a chance to eat. So, I was eating way too much before or after a shift, at times of the day where most people aren’t getting their meal. That behavior is one of a dozen reasons I quit my old job because the pounds just jumped way up the more I had to work.

So, I’m trying to eat on a loose schedule. If my taste buds demand more of something, anything to put in the stomach, that’s where a light coffee or cup of tea will come in handy, with maybe a small spoon of creamer or honey respectively to give it a little something. And today seems to be going well. I’m mostly alert and getting things done today.

Because I don’t want to fall asleep too early (damned storm’s making it tempting to just pass out because it’s so dark), I’m gonna make a cup of coffee (half-caff so I don’t stay up all night) and get a couple of ginger snaps as small dunkable snacks. I like coconut macaroons with my coffee usually (dunno why, I just figured out it tasted pretty good together), but I can inhale those like crazy. Ginger snaps are so damned spicy I can’t eat more than 1 or 2 at a time.

Hmm… spicy cookies. A little sweet without overindulging…

I have recipes, I know it.