Funny how that could apply to a house or the human body–both, in my case. I mean, the maintenance part will work well with the house (working on that). The body’s nearly at “gotta fix what’s broke” stage.

I’m not saying that because I hate my body or anything (okay, I’ll admit, sometimes I do–a lifetime of being told crap and believing crap takes time to get over), but I’ve let depression get to me too long and the laziness take hold. That has led to some really crappy habits in eating and keeping active. As I’m living with my dogs and my bird, I’ve gotta take care of these guys, and if I don’t do anything to improve my health, that’s gonna make it hard to be there for them.

As I don’t have kiddos–non-furry or feathered ones, anyway–yes, that’s a concern.

I keep remembering one of my fave bits of wisdom from Mr. Spock, where in the Wrath of Khan he said:

As a matter of cosmic history, it has always been easier to destroy than to create.

Yes, I know he was talking about the Genesis torpedo, but I feel that it goes pretty well for us, too.

It’s easier to just let things go and not do anything about them than to make changes. It takes less energy to let that happen, and yet, we complain when things don’t go right.

I’ll be doing some repair work around my yard, a bit at a time. It will be better than leaving it to get worse and ultimately destroying my equipment (or ending up with more mice in the house because the yard resembles a meadow more than a yard and they are comfy coming so close–gah!).

But I will also take the time–because it’s getting really freaking hot–to do something good for myself in the air conditioning. Now that my ankle’s better, I’ll be getting back on the elliptical trainer and making a habit of it. I should’ve done it today, but figuring out how much time I really need to get things done (and all the laundry I procrastinated on) meant today wasn’t a good day to start that.

But Wednesday is usually a great starting point when Sunday or Monday don’t cut it. It’s the middle of the week, and a day that screams “I’m not waiting for days and days to get this crap done–nope, gotta do it now!” I actually have a schedule that makes sense, and since today was my first practice day at home with piano and guitar, I have a better idea how much time to set aside for music and exercise each day.

More than I thought, for sure, but that will make it easier not to brush something off. After all, I tend to underestimate how much time it’ll take to actually get things done, and then things just “fall by the wayside” and that’s how I get stuck where I’m at–a house that needs a good cleaning and a body that needs a trip to the shop to get tuned up… by work out.

Besides, what’s the point in setting up a gym if I never use it? I still have some things that need setting up and out of the way, but I have enough space to use what I’ve already got that’s put together. The rest can come a bit at a time, in between things. After all, it’s a bit of weight lifting (hee hee), but ensures I won’t overdo things and get in worse shape by making myself all sore and not wanting to move ever again because I had to try every piece of equipment.

Slow and steady.

Of course, I had that ankle injury a few weeks ago. I can say with certainty that I’ve had no pain hiccups the past week, so I know I’m good to exercise and put some weight on it again. I just get the occasional twinge in my knee from twisting it too often in my life. But hey–that’s why starting out on relatively unfamiliar equipment, taking my time will help a ton in the long run anyway.

I can’t wait to implement my new schedule for tomorrow. I have to kind of play things week-by-week (part due to weather, part to freaky stupid and weird schedule changes at work), but I know this week is good.

Perhaps something else good will come out of this: if I have the schedule made up and ready to go, and suddenly there’s a last minute change, I’ll just have to say “no” and stick to it. I try to leave myself some leeway so if I have to go in just an hour or so early, no biggie. But three or four hours early? Nope–not doing it.

Next week’s gonna be crazy enough (I have to drive an hour farther to help a bunch of kiddos next week by myself–my usual backup/crazy friend had a car accident and needs PT for a few more weeks). It’ll be hard enough to get what I can done already without having another schedule change. I will be strung so tight there’s no way in hell I can add to my work schedule.

I must take care of myself and what I want. I swear, doing those lessons made me happy, even though what I was learning was tricky and today’s practice session was tough with what I was trying to do on my own. But I felt productive, and that’s important.

Perhaps this weekend I’ll get another cookbook and make an easier recipe. I tried too hard last time I shopped and most of those supplies ended up going to waste. One thing at a time.

One recipe at a time.

Get a wheelbarrow full of dirt and fill a hole at a time.

Go room by room–look at what you need to clean and take it one step at a time.

I’m tired of the all-or-nothing mindset I’ve been living with, part of that damned “practicality” I had drilled into my head for so many years. I lose my nerve and quit before I’ve hit step B because I was at A then looked and saw how far Z was and freaked.

Nope, small steps are worth it. It’s like maintenance–we don’t say “what’s the point of having lunch? I’m just going to have to eat again at dinnertime anyway.” We nourish ourselves (or at least fill the hole these days) because it helps us keep going.

Small steps will get us far in the long run, whether it’s taking care of a house or ourselves.

And I think I’ll rest easy tonight, knowing that I’ve got reasonable goals to try out this week, a practice room that’s awesome, a kitchen that’s getting cleaner, and happy dogs to keep me going.