I have to admit, I am not a terribly patient person. I get focused on an idea I want to implement and I just get going as far as I can before I lose gas and stop for a while.

I’ve been trying to take this ankle injury slow and let it heal, but there doesn’t seem to be a good benchmark for what healing is. I mean, it feels okay at times, and then it’ll have a sharp twinge when I least expect it, which has me hobbling a bit.

It might mean I have to wear the funky moon boot a few more days. I haven’t since Friday because it was starting to smell thanks to the humidity and daily wear, but also because of how tall it is. It was several inches more than my other shoe, and so my walk and stance were lopsided. That’s not so bad, and even to be expected, except that my left knee tends to be the one that gets bent out of shape if my odd twinges get going.

I don’t know what’s wrong with my left knee, except somehow I think I’ve twisted it too many times in my life. My right one barely bothers me, but I noticed that after a week of walking around with that boot on, my left knee started to tell me something.

I don’t know how to describe the pain when it comes, but when I was heading to bed and stretching my leg out to get under the sheet last week, that knee almost made me scream. It was so sudden, a feeling like I had just started stretching a rubber band that was already near to breaking point.

Glad I had plenty of ibuprofen and Icy Hot to help me get some sleep that night.

But that told me to lay off the boot for at least a day and try to just keep going with the cane and some cushy flip-flops (wasn’t sure about my sneakers, since they’d be rubbing against the sorest spots on that damaged ankle). That worked out okay, but when this knee gets going, it takes a few days.

Today was a matter of the knee and ankle taking turns being the bigger whiny bitch.

This has led me to be really pessimistic today, as I’d hoped the bad weather would give me the incentive to do some slow, safe exercises out in the shed. But if my knee and ankle are going to rebel…ugh.

I have perfectly good exercise equipment I’d been wanting to get back to using and I’m still on probation as far as movements beyond basic walking (at least, that’s according to the leg).

I know we’re supposed to listen to our bodies, but I can’t help feeling like mine is super stupid and needs to actually listen to one of my pep talks to myself. I don’t want to be in pain when trying to go up and down steps or playing with the dogs.

No, I want to heal up and get working in my yard again, and get exercising regularly without another dose of Murphy’s law.

I suppose I should be glad this didn’t get worse…but it’s the waiting game that’s driving me nuts. Everybody seems to heal up at different rates, depending on the type of damage. So that gives me very little help in determining when things are going wrong. If the area’s still tender by day blah-blah, or pressure hurts it by blah-blah, etc., then I need to go back to the doc.

That would be a nice guesstimation factor.

My ankle is just driving me nuts. I actually went before work yesterday for a foot massage in the hopes that it would limber my ankle up a bit (and help that poor knee that’s been compensating). It did a pretty good job it, at least at first. I think it’s just walking around this yard–the yard I can’t finish working on BECAUSE of said ankle–that’s making it so rotten.

I stayed in today, even though after I got called in to work for a few hours I’d been itching to drag out the push mower and take care of at least a little yard-work.

The rain that was about to start helped. I just am annoyed that I can’t go exercise without making things worse on my equipment right now.

And today’s rainy afternoon would’ve been the perfect day to play with some more settings on the elliptical, even the easiest ones.

Maybe by this weekend it’ll be okay to do a little working out.

I just wish it was now.

Perhaps I can learn more patience, if this is the way it’s going to be for a while.

…Boy that’s going to be tough.